Episode 019: The Sophie's Choice of Baseball

Matthew and Toby discuss ridiculous things about the All Star Game, mostly to bemoan the lack of meaningful baseball being played all week. Not that anyone needs to be reminded, but Matthew is still very disappointed about baseball fans' banter skills. And he submits a scientif-ish theory about why home runs are mysteriously up throughout baseball this year. The boys make a half-hearted attempt empathy with internet celebrity Erin Faulk, aka @erinscafe on Twitter dot com. Erin's a Dodgers fan, and she's leading the charge against "God Bless America." [NOTE: Battery Mates is looking for audio production interns! Have a Mac and ready to get your start in the podcasting biz? Hit up @battery_mates on the Tweetbots.]

Episode 018: 100 Emoji, 100 Emoji, American Flag Emoji... 3 Fire Emojis, etc.

Matthew is joined by guest co-host Alex Wall for a special on-location episode. Recorded in Chicago at the Emerald Loop on the day of Toby's wedding, Alex and Matthew pay tribute to Cleveland's incredible sports month, Trevor Bauer's incredible internet trolling, and how incredible some of Battery Mates Nation's pre-season predictions look at the halfway mark. Toby's dad, Gary, joins for a half-hearted attempt at empathy and mostly just tells embarrassing stories about his son.

Episode 017: People's Self-Reported Wave Propensity

Matthew and Toby return from a week off mostly to hear Toby break down emotionally about Cleveland's first championship in 52 years. The boys make a half-hearted attempt at empathy with John Hagner, professional pollster and Battery Mates' own Statto. Hagner presents a truly unique way of dealing with being a Cubs and Nationals fan, and walks us through some of the highlights from a recent Public Policy Polling sports poll. Toby and Matthew wrap up the show trying to examine the game's super obscure time-play rule.

Episode 016: An Eephus Pitch Without the Knowledge and Foresight

On location in Chicago, Matthew and Toby sit down for a big baseball chat with political guru David Axelrod. Axe explains how he can manage to root for both of Chicago's baseball teams, and tells a few great stories about how his love for baseball intersected with his job as senior advisor to President Obama in the White House. Along the way, he walks Battery Mates Nation through the full backstory behind the curse of the billy goat, and gives a sneak peek at a piece he’s working on about the Cubs' renaissance. EXCLUSIVE MUST CITE: Axe reveals a formative baseball-related moment from the President's early political career. 

Episode 015: What Happens at Revco...

The boys pay tribute to The Greatest, Toby admits he’s under high levels of emotional stress thanks to the NBA Finals, and Matthew shines a light on the shenanigans going on behind the scenes of All Star Game voting. Justin Barasky, Priorities USA communications director and lifelong Cleveland sports fan (who also pulls for the Cubs) joins in for a half-hearted attempt at empathy, shows off some next-level knowledge of Fleetwood Mac, and implicates himself in an unsolved crime from the 1990s.

Episode 014: Good Bants

Matthew and Toby return from a week away to mark the end of the first quarter of the 2016 season and revisit predictions from Battery Mates Nation. The boys celebrate the 23rd anniversary of one of the greatest moments in baseball history, and Matthew bemoans the lack of Good Bants™ at ballparks. Thus the world gets to witness the debut of two new bants hot and fresh out of Matthew's kitchen, and he promises to take requests. Toby attempts some half-hearted empathy with Hillary for America email director (and Nationals fan) Amanda Litman. During the discussion, it becomes clear Matthew doesn't know that Beyoncé and Taylor Swift are different people, and all parties discover that Drew Storen might be a lot less to blame for the Nationals' 2012 postseason woes than initially believed.

Episode 013: Stadium Mustard (take 2)

Toby and Matthew are on location at Progressive Field in Cleveland, Ohio. They sit down to chat with three real-life members of the Indians staff: Joel Hammond, assistant director of communications, who oversees social media strategy; Christy Corfias, manager of strategy and analytics who's much smarter than your hosts; and Anne Keegan, director of service excellence, who gave us a tour of the facilities. Listen in as the boys nearly have a stroke due to excitement.

Episode 012: The Historic Bartolo Colon HR (Souvenir Edition)

Matthew and Toby are forced to scrap the episode they had in the bag when the baseball gods intervene -- first by destroying the audio recording and then by bestowing us with National Treasure Bartolo Colon's first career home run. That makes him the oldest player in history to record his first dinger, and it makes all baseball fans around the country #blessed. In further Big Sexy Big Fly coverage, special correspondent Peter Bondi sends in a firsthand report on location from the game, and a handful of Mets fans relay where they were when they heard the news. Matthew discusses bringing relegation to Major League Baseball, and for #engagement, Battery Mates Nation weigh in on which baseball players will probably be voting for The Donald.

Episode 011: Gandhi's Views on the Shift

Matthew and Toby get serious for once and weigh in on proposals to ban the shift, and all those hot takes around Dee Gordon's PED suspension. Famous baseball blogger and dabbler in presidential politics Jeremy Bird joined the program to discuss being a Cardinals fan, and to explain why he's still unhappy about the price of Budweiser at Busch Stadium. (Fun fact: The Battery Mates Scheduling Department happened to find a day when Jeremy and Matthew's teams were facing off in both baseball and Premier League soccer.) And users of Twitter dot com weighed in on what the New Orleans Triple-A team should be called. All things considered, they kept it pretty tasteful.

Episode 010: Bryce Harper Has a Very, Very Recognizable Face

Toby and Matthew welcome Orioles fan Kelly Kreft to chat about Wayne Kirby, Jake Arrieta's sudden (suspicious) dominance, and the city of Baltimore's alleged defiling of our national anthem. Matthew explores the "anything can happen" side of baseball with a report on the Nationals' recent 16-inning victory over the Twins. And Toby requests Battery Mates Nation send prayers to the baseball gods on behalf of recently injured star pitcher Carlos "Cookie" Carrasco. Our hosts turn to Twitter to find out the right and wrong way to handle catching a foul ball, and the dream of going to umpire school is born. 

Episode 009: Harry Caray Was an Awful Babysitter

Matthew and Toby reflect on Jackie Robinson Day and are joined by Think Progress senior editor Kiley Kroh to talk about her fantastic story on the Nationals' youth baseball academy in D.C.'s 7th Ward. Toby reports on seeing National Treasure Bartolo Colon pitch this weekend and Matthew shows off his American history chops while waxing poetic about underrated President James Garfield. A half-hearted attempt at empathy is made with Cubs fan and Democratic communications professional Hari Sevugan, who passes down some actually-solid wisdom from a television actor. And Matthew lets it slip that he cursed Barack Obama on the evening of the first presidential debate in 2012.

Episode 008: Don't Let Anybody Ever Tell You That Extortion Doesn't Work

Matthew and Toby run down the early returns from the first week of real baseball, and speak to Seth Reznik, an acquaintance of Mr. Met, about his memories of his team's last championship in 1986. Only one White House press secretary participates in this episode's #engagement with his predictions for the upcoming season. And the boys dig deep on MLB's new rules regarding "the definition of touch."

Episode 007: Opening Day

Matthew and Toby celebrate the highest of holidays, the start of the Major League Baseball season, by fielding YOUR predictions for the coming campaign. The response was incredible: Hillary fans, Bernie fans, even a fan of the Colorado Rockies... It's clear the one thing we can all agree on is thank the good lord baseball is back.

Episode 006: Don't Mention Goats

Matthew and Toby tackle some real heady subjects, from the President’s Cuba trip to whether a mime doing calisthenics is the jinx we all know is coming for the 2016 Chicago Cubs. Things get heated over if/when it’s ever appropriate to do the wave at a game. And guest—former White House digital strategist and Red Sox fan Erin Lindsay—confesses something dark in her baseball past.

Oh, and there’s a call to action, too. Record your 2016 MLB predictions for a very special Opening Day episode. Here's what to do: 

1. Open up Voice Memo or your preferred audio recording application. 

2. Record yourself saying these things: 

  • Your name
  • Your team
  • How many games you think they'll win this season
  • How far they'll go
  • Who do you think plays in the World Series? And who wins?

Example: "Hi, I'm Jeff, and I'm a Dodgers fan. I think my team will win 65 games this season after Clayton Kershaw decides to retire mid-season to pursue a film career. So they'll end up in last place. I have the Astros and the Giants in the World Series, and I think the Astros sweep them because screw the Giants and their even-numbered-year streak."

3. Send it to us before Thursday, March 31st. Just send us the audio file -- the email address is thebatterymates@gmail.com.

Sign up for our “3 Up, 3 Down” newsletter for the full show notes: https://tinyletter.com/Battery_Mates

Episode 005: #MitchFacts

Matthew and Toby get emotional about the fact that baseball is happening, and put on their tinfoil hats to discuss HankGate, the shocking scandal surrounding the Brewers' unofficial mascot. Mitch Stewart—internet celebrity, Obama alum, and current holder of the University of South Dakota Coyotes single-season HR record—joins in to talk about his playing days and to try to defend being a Yankees fan. And he gets his much-vaunted (by him) baseball knowledge put to the test.

Episode 003: Kabaddi, Kabaddi, Kabaddi, Kabaddi

Matthew and Toby brave Winter Storm Jonas and spotty internet to talk about the Finnish version of baseball, the dreaded complexities of the infield fly rule, Toby's ridiculous beard, and just how old Ronald Reagan really was. Plus, a lifelong Cubs fan joins in for this week's Half-Hearted Attempt at Empathy.

Show notes:
- Pesäpallo | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pes%C3%A4pallo
- Kabaddi | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kabaddi
- Jonas | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/January_2016_United_States_blizzard
- Ronnie Reagan's early days calling Cubs games | http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/americanexperience/features/general-article/reagan-career
- Harry Chiti | https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Chiti

Fact check: Madeleine fact-checked herself shortly after recording this episode. That amazing Cubs game she witnessed in person was played against the Colorado Rockies, not the Chicago White Sox. We thank her for the honesty.